Saturday, March 23, 2013

I'm gone

I attempted to kill myself today. I passed out but ended up waking up. I can't take my life anymore. I have nothing, I am nothing, I have no one, I am in constant pain, I can't find anywhere that I belong, I can't find positive friends, I can't get a man to stay with me, I can't stop loving people, I'm lonely, people want to use me, I have no one to talk to, I use chat rooms just to talk to anyone, I dont fit into society anymore. I need to find something that I can just fall asleep forever. I need a poisoned apple. Please god. Please take my life away. I don't need it anymore. I don't have a place in this world. I don't even have a place to live. What kind of person am I? Am I even a person. I need help. I need someone to smile at me. I need someone to love me. Please someone love me. Please someone take me in their arms. Please someone just look at me. I need you. I need you to look in my eyes and hold me. Cradle me. I'm so lost. What has my life become? I beg for him to love me everyday. I miss you. You made me feel like I mattered in this world. Please. Please do it again. I need you. I don't even have family. I have no one. Blogger and Twitter are the only things I have.

I need you someone.

9 comments :

  1. Lets talk asap I can totally relate, facebook.com/dennisvega
    I care :)

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  3. If you ever want to talk just join a site like tumblr or contact me on fb "ryan unmole".. i really care, trust :) Know that you can get through this and you will, have faith in yourself, you are a strong, kind person and people value you :D

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  4. Life is precious.
    Problems don't last forever.
    Life is good when you make it that way.
    Experiencing things is way better than rotting away.
    Death is the end of life, laughter, fun times, hopes and dreams.

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  5. I found you through the peels info too. Reading your posts I had a feeling that this post was coming up, even though I was hoping it wasn't. Please find a reason to stay around. You seem like a really intelligent, positive person. I'm sure you will meet someone again and be surrounded by good people. Keep working towards things getting better and getting away from things that cause you pain. I'm no expert but I wanted to let you know that there are people out there that care, even if they haven't met you in person.

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  6. I wanted to start anew and left NYC for college in Indiana-- I absolutely failed the readjustment. I was out of place. I was jaded, I felt emaciated, and I had gone through chronic insomnia, too. I wanted to sleep forever. Somewhere along the way, I knew waiting for the good things to come into my life wasn't acceptable. I got up, took a steamy shower, did some cardio, watched Scrubs (You better watch it lol), and became invested in what I was learning again, while making time for hobbies. This didn't take me a week, a month or even a year. But it didn't take me two years.
    Pick the weeds and keep the flowers in your life. Don't let your future and your potential be predicated by a momentary strain. Man...you have a great personality and we'd be buds if we met in real life. Be the best that you can be at the moment.

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  7. I was doing a research about TCA peel and my friend Google got me here. There are a lot of people in this world,there is no way you can be lonely. everyone is different, you might just happen to meet people that are not that... you know what I mean. anyhow, don\t attempt to kill your self ever again. if you want a friend to talk to, \i\m here, www.facebook.com/ulyssesdwight

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